"I wonder why afternoons always make you feel sleepy like this."
Mion spoke in a voice that went so far as to make whoever heard it lethargic.
"You want a medical explanation for sleepiness?
I could say it, but it'll just make you more sleepy."
"...Gah~ ...Spare me~..."
It was almost 3 o'clock.
6th period was almost over.
By the way, Satoko and everyone else in the lower grades ended their school day after 5th period, so they were probably running around in the schoolyard right now.
I could hear their joy-filled voices coming from there right now. Oh, what I would give to be able to join them.
"Mii-chan, you're the class representative, so you have to try harder.
No going to sleep~."
"You see, rather than the class representative, I'd rather be the president of the boxing club.
They get to sleep a lot."
"Huh? ...What makes you think that?"
"At the boxing gym they're always hitting the sack. Get it?"
BAM!
The teacher cackled as she hit the back of Mion's head with the corner of a textbook.
"...That's all from me.
I'll leave it at that for today.
Representative, please direct the class."
"Everybody stand up!
At attention!!"
Mion, who had been half-asleep, became lively again the moment she heard class was over.
...It must be delightful to be that shrewd.
Homeroom was done after the lower grades had finished their lessons, so we were free to go.
It was one of the odd rules we had as a mixed-grade school.
When they knew class was over, Satoko and Rika-chan returned to the classroom.
"...Good work today."
"All right!! It's time for happy fun club activities!!"
"Yeah!
That's right.
What should we do today?"
"Hey, Mii-chan.
Why don't we continue what we started yesterday?"
"Yes!
We should do that!
To have it end like that when things were getting good, I won't accept it!"
"Now now.
I know how you feel, but let's save that for another time!
Something like that shouldn't be done somewhere dinky like a classroom after school, but a grander stage!"
"I'm down whenever.
But some of the younger guys said they'd watch me in the finals.
So let me know ahead of time."
"Whoa!
Keiichi-kun, you're amazing!
There's people cheering you on! Cheering you on!
...I wonder if there's anybody cheering on Rena..."
I couldn't help but watch as Rena entered her Pining Maiden Mode.
"I'm not gonna pull any punches, but I'll pray for your victory, Rena."
With a saccharine Keiichi-brand smile, I ruffled Rena's hair roughly.
"Wha!?
Hau~~~!?!?
...Ke-Ke-Ke-Ke...
Keiichi-kun,
what.. are you... hau~~..."
Rena turned bright red and short-circuited, smoke billowing from both her ears.
Gazing into her eyes, a strange scene of me holding hands with Rena and skipping through a flowerbed was reflected there...
...Ahh... even if it was in somebody else's imagination, it was terribly troubling...
"...Meet Keiichi, the Rena-killer."
When Rika-chan said that, everyone burst out laughing at once.
"Ahahaha!
That Rena is a Satoko and Rika-chan killer, though!"
"It may be true that we can't win against Rena... but we won't lose to Keiichi!!"
"Oh~ This is becoming a pretty interesting relationship map.
Our strengths kind of interact like in rock-paper-scissors!
...But that doesn't include Mion, does it?"
"Of course not.
It doesn't matter who it is, I won't lose."
Mion leered with the gaze befitting of a club president— no... befitting of an empress!
The mood in the room became more lively.
It was as good a moment as any to get started!
"Well now!
Let's get started nice and easy!"
"Yeah!
So then Mii-chan, what shall we do today? Today?"
Mion let out a small interjection as she rummaged through the so-called "Club Locker."
Every time I look... there's always a ton of things crammed in there.
Everything that's jammed in that locker is a game of some kind, you know?
On top of that, things used for penalty games like cat-ears and collars were kept in there... the capacity of that thing is unfathomable!
...That locker, maybe it actually extended through the wall into the 4th dimension... that's my theory, anyways.
If not that, then how else could you explain how someone could pull out item after item!?
After Mion touched her hand to her chin briefly in thought, she turned around without pulling out any games.
"Why don't we try and keep it a bit simple today?
Playing games that require lots of pieces all the time can be a little bland, right?"
"...It doesn't matter what game it is, if everybody plays together we can have fun."
"Yeah. That's right. That's right!"
Rena and I both expressed our agreement.
...I feel the same way.
With this group, there's no doubt even if we were pulling weeds from the school grounds it would be fun.
"...That wouldn't be fun for me.
Pulling weeds or whatever."
"Ah, that's right, isn't it?
...By the way, Satoko.
Could you stop reading people's minds by looking at their expressions?"
"Whatever you're thinking is always written all over your face.
So I always know right away~."
I've always been told that, but ever since I transferred it seems like it's been especially bad...
I need to develop a poker face or I could be in for a rough time...
"Alright! Everybody pay attention~!
I'm going to explain the rules~!!"
We all immediately cut the idle chatter and put on stern expressions.
In no time at all, everybody's gaze focused like a tiger or a shark, listening intently.
That's right.
From the point where the rules are explained... the match has already begun!
"Today's game is... probably better known as a party game.
It's called 'Sympathy.' Has anybody heard of it before?"
...Sympathy.
It means to share someone's feelings, right?
...Huh? Maybe I might know this...
"Mii-chan, maybe it's...
The game where we choose a topic, and everybody writes down the first word that comes to mind...
And the more people who share the same answers, the more points are awarded?
In that case, Rena knows about it!"
Ahh... I remember!
I recall playing a game like that in grade school while we were on the bus during a field trip!
"I'm not familiar with this game.
I would like an explanation."
"First of all, we have the leader choose a topic.
For example... if they choose 'dessert.'"
"Hehehe!
Satoko-chan, when somebody says 'dessert,' what's the first thing you think of?"
"...Ummm.
...Let's see here...
'Pudding' or something."
"Ok! In that case, Satoko, you would write down 'pudding' on your memo pad.
Then, everybody reveals their answer at the same time.
If there's two or more people who wrote down 'pudding,' they get points!
The more people who write down the same answer, the more points are awarded. So if everybody writes down the same answer, that's a max of 5 points!"
"...In other words, the trick is to think so that what you write down is the same answer as everybody else."
It was exactly as Rika-chan said.
The point of this game was to think in a way so that you have the same answer as everybody else.
For example... even if you heard the word 'dessert' and immediately thought of 'strawberry sundae'...
...If your answer doesn't match up with everybody else you don't get any points.
That's why you have to hold off on that answer, and change to one that seems like one everybody else will choose...
The key becomes not what you think yourself, but being able to predict what everybody else will answer. It's a very high-level intellectual game!!
"...Mii, for Satoko's sake, let's try practicing for one round."
"OK~. For this round, seeing as I'm club president, the leader will be me, alright?
The topic can be something random..."
Taking out her literature textbook, she began flipping to a random page.
"Alright then... this is the only practice round!
...The first topic is...
'Shaved Ice'!!!"
"Ahahaha!
When you say 'shaved ice'... there's only one answer, isn't there~!"
Among the standard flavors of shaved ice, there's strawberry, melon, and Blue Hawaii.
The most popular amongst those... is obviously melon!
"Everyone wrote down an answer?
Then everybody show theirs at the same time, okay?
Ready... go!"
"Strawberry." "Melon." "Ujigintoki." "Strawberry." "Strawberry."
Wha—!?!? I'm the only one.. with melon!?
"Y-You guys...!
Don't go doing something so mundane as picking strawberry as the standard!
Hey Rena, would you actually order strawberry shaved ice!?
The first thing that always sells out at summer festivals is always melon, isn't it!?!?"
"Rena also likes melon flavor!
But really... it's all about the strawberry, right? Right☆!"
"Kei-chan, if I was to pick, I would actually choose melon.
But you see, this is a word association game.
If somebody says shaved ice the first thing you think of is strawberry!"
I'm still not entirely convinced... but in any case! It's this type of game!!
"R-Rika, what exactly did you write?
Is that a type of shaved ice??"
"...It's ujigintoki.
It's incredibly delicious, you know."
Well, it might be delicious, sure... but it's not exactly run-of-the-mill.
..Still... that's a pretty refined choice...
"Satoko, did this help you get a good idea?
There were 3 people who wrote down strawberry, so those people get 3 points!
We compete to see who can get the most!"
"Yeah, yeah!
I've got it!!
More importantly, Mion-san.
What shall we do about today's penalty game!?"
"Hau...!
Th-There's going to be one after all...
...What will it be? ...What will it be!"
"Hmmm...
What should it be?
...Kei-chan, you have a suggestion?"
"Wha- for the penalty game??"
"...When I was in elementary school... there was a penalty game... yeah.
It can only be 'that.'
Schlepping!"
"In other words, that thing where the loser has to carry around everybody else's baggage.
It happened often to the boys.
Elementary school kids walking around completely covered in backpacks, you see it a lot~!"
"But... how will we do that?
Satoko-chan and Rika-chan's houses are the complete opposite direction from ours."
"Then how about... the loser carries just the winner's stuff to their house?
Getting everybody's stuff to their house would involve covering a pretty sizable distance."
"Oh, yeah.
Just that much... might be alright!"
"...Somehow, today's penalty game is pretty simple.
With a penalty game of this level it wouldn't even be fun to make Keiichi-san do it!!"
"Then shall we raise the stakes a bit!
Not just playing porter...
...
Tadaa!
How about we have someone schlep stuff around dressed in this!?"
"Wh-Wh—!!!
Why a maid outfit of all things!?!?"
"H-Hau...!
I-It's cute and all... b-but no waaaaaaaaaaaay~!!!!"
"...But you see, you see!
What do we do if Keiichi-san loses?
If we don't have a size that fits him..."
"Oh I didn't let that little detail get by~!
I have a nice XL size one prepared juuust for Kei-chan!!
So, Kei-chan, are you ready!?
I'm going to have you walk around outside dressed up as a maid~!!!
From the headband to the garter belt, even the underwear... I've got it aaaaall prepared for you!!"
"T-T-This is insane!! Why do you have every possible size of that type of thing in that locker!?"
Th-This is bad, Keiichi Maebara!!
Somehow... it's become a situation where only my failure results in an overly cruel price to pay.
What if I make a mistake and lose...!?
I wouldn't be able to walk around in broad daylight anymore!!
Oh, Ma'am, about that Maebara boy...
Did you hear about him?
It seems like he has a penchant for cross-dressing.
Oh my, really?
That'd be so embarrassing, you know? Ooohohoho!!
"Ngyaaaa----!!!
Th-That's way too harsh!!!!!"
That's just incredibly... brutal!!
If we're to return this penalty to some semblance of normalcy, now is the only time!
E-Everybody, I think we should refrain from this unwholesome penalty game...!!!
Why on the way back home from school!?
Do we have to be accompanied by a girl wearing a maid uniform and carrying our baggage!?
Having them say "Master,"
while dragging them around the village in such an embarrassing outfit...
...*pant pant*
...Wait, why am I panting?
...Wh-What is this...
This feeling welling up inside me...
"Hey, let's just make it a normal penalty game...!
Wait, Keiichi-kun has frozen stiff..."
*FOOOOOM*!!!
Burning with passion, I firmly placed my hands on Rena's shoulders!!!
"Rena, there is no problem with the penalty game.
...I just have to win!!
That's right, everybody!!!"
I turned to everybody with an idiotic grin, my pearly whites flashing with a brilliant gleam.
"Oh, Kei-chan, you've come around to the idea, eh?"
"No matter what the penalty game is, there's no reason to be afraid!!
You just have to win!!
Right, everybody!?
Yeah! Yeah!"
"""Yeaaaaaaaaah—!!!"""
From Mion to Rika, everybody energetically thrust their fists up high!!
Only Rena seemed somewhat undecided, standing there looking flustered.
...She's a little bit slow, isn't she. If she wins, even for Rena it's quite a delectable opportunity!
"Hey, Rena.
Don't you see this is a pretty big opportunity!?
...Rika-chan or Satoko-chan in a maid outfit, coming right to your doorstep. This is a historically great chance, isn't it!?"
*sploosh*
Rena began spouting a fountain of blood from her nose.
The look in her eyes completely changed... she's shifted into Kyute Mode!
I was waiting for this Rena!!
That look in her eyes!!
"Hau~~~, to my doorstep~!!!
It's not like Keiichi-kun or Mii-chan wouldn't be good too~! Hau!"
"Alright!!
It looks like everybody's prepared themselves!!
Get your memo pads ready!!
First question, ready!?"
Mion opened up her textbook to a random page, and read out a word that caught her eye!
"The first topic is...
'Summer Break'!!"
This is yet another... quite abstract keyword.
...Well then, let's not worry about it too much and start with something like this.
"Everybody good!?
Time to show 'em!
Ready, go!!!"
On Mion's signal, everybody simultaneously held up what they wrote.
Let's see, what did everybody write?
"Summer Festival." "Summer Festival." "Fireworks." "Mosquito Coils."
"Oh, Rena and I have the same answer!
Alright! Two points!"
"But Satoko's 'Fireworks' was pretty good too.
Rika's 'Mosquito Coil' is a very nice seasonal choice as well."
"...All the choices are quite invigorating."
"It's almost summer break, isn't it.
...I wonder how we'll spend it this year."
Invigorating words that invoke the image of summer break.
Certainly things that enrich the soul.
As everybody approaches the soon-to-come summer break... a plethora of dreams should be etched upon their thoughts...
"...By the way... Keiichi-san, what did you answer?
Hurry up and show us."
"Ah.... I di-didn't really write down anything that great..."
"No no no!
Showing us is part of the rules!! Now come on!"
"Ah... stop it!
D-Don't look!!!"
"Homework."
The room went silent.
...Nobody could really follow up that response.
It's as if my impertinent answer had somehow sullied the wonderful dreams of the coming summer break...
"Keiichi-kun's summer breaks...
...
were never fun, were they..."
"...It's alright.
Let's spend the summer this year with everybody.
...We won't leave you by your lonesome."
Rika-chan gently petted my head.
Wh-what exactly did summer break mean to me...
...Summer courses.
Observing sunflowers.
Practice exams.
Special summer focus seminars.
...I know nothing of hot summers.
Because I've always been in an air-conditioned cram school...
...Ugh... the tears... they...
"...Kei-chan's summer breaks were always devoid of hopes and dreams, weren't they..."
"Wa... WaaaaAAaaaaAaaaaaaaAAAaaaaa!!!
Don't look at me with such pity in your eyes! Don't look at meeeheeeeheeeeeeeeeEEEeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!"
...This game called 'Sympathy' may be more terrifying than I could ever imagine...
"Well, anyhoo!
Rena and I get 2 points each!!
Let's keep going!! ...Next is...
'Fish'!!!"
So, it's "Fish"!
Come to think about it, I haven't eaten sushi in a while.
By the way, rather than lean tuna, I'm quite the connoisseur on things like flounder!
...I wonder who I'll match with this answer.
Because for a Japanese person, anyone would think of this.
"Alright, everybody!
This time we'll start from mine!!
Ready, go!!"
"Sushi."
How about that for an answer!
When you see a lively fish, do you want to steam it or grill it?
No, to have fresh sashimi is the epitome of cuisine!
Rather than write "sashimi," however, I'll choose the more amiable term in "sushi" - That is my cunning ploy!!
...But contrary to the intrepid resolve of my reply, everybody's expression was listless.
"Oh. That's right...
When you say 'Fish'... ...I see.
...Sushi is tasty, isn't it."
"Wa-aaaaaaAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa!!
Stop talking to me in that consoling tone! Stop iiiiiiiiiiiit!!!"
"Well then, should the rest of us show our answers?
Ready, go!"
"Dolphin."
" Whale."
" Aquarium."
" Aquarium."
"Rika and I have the same answer!
That's 2 points!!"
"Rena picked whale, eh?
I thought about that too,
but I ended up picking dolphin."
"Ah, really!?
Rena wanted to write dolphin at first... but Rena didn't think anybody else would write it..."
"...Either one of them is very kyute."
Everybody, excluding me, stopped and stared blankly as their thoughts drifted over the horizon. It seems as if they can hear the roar of the open sea from over there...
"This means everybody has 2 points!
Well... everybody but Keiichi-san!"
"...Keiichi-kun's answers...
were worth 0 points,
...but Rena thinks they were very unique and interesting! Interesting!"
"To immediately think of food when you hear the word fish.
...Kei-chan, you should really be ashamed of how destitute your soul is, huh."
"WaaaAAAaaaaaaaaaaaAAaaaaa!!
Don't say something like my soul is destituuuuuuuuUUuuuuuuuuuute!!
Besides, what's with Mion and Rena's answers, anyways!
Those aren't even fish!
Those are mammals!!"
"Objection overruled!!
Next!!"
Wh-What a horrid game this is today!!
As the games pile on and on, it seems as if I will be further exposed as a petty human being!!
I'm the only one who still hasn't earned any points!!
I want to at least get a point in the next round!!
"Alright, the next topic is...
'Sakura'!"
Dammit!!
This time I'll do it!!
Keep your cool, Keiichi Maebara!
Don't think what you would normally think!
Everybody else here is a girl!
Stop thinking like a man!!
If you write down "Sakura Mochi" here you'll only be repeating the tragedies of the past!
Throw away that gastrocentric male sensibility!
Just for now think of yourself as a girl!
You are a girl...
You are a girl...
I am a girl...!!!
"Everybody finished writing!?
Let's do it!!"
"Keiichi-san, if you don't start getting points right now, won't it be a bit dangerous~?"
Hmph!
This time it's perfect.
I've completely suppressed my own instincts.
This time... I will have a match!
No, I will *make* it match!!!
"Keiichi-kun, you seem pretty confident about this one!
You see this time, Rena thought like a boy so I could match up with your answer.
Ehehe~... 'Sakura Mochi'☆"
"... I like them too.
I wrote it down."
Rena and Rika giggled together.
"WhooOOOOOooooaaaaaaahh!!
Now is not the time to think with your stomach!!"
"Well then, did Keiichi-san write the same answer as me? I put down 'Hanami'!"
"That's riiiight!
When you say 'Sakura' it just has to be 'Hanami,' yeah?
I wrote that down too!"
Mion and Satoko's response was 'Hanami'!
'Hanami,' seriously!?!?
"Th-Th-That's the kind of event where old geezers getting drunk and doing all sorts of depraved things is the standard, isn't iiiiiiitttt!!!
And why of all times did you just decide to abandon answering from a girl's point of view!!"
"Well then, Kei-chan.
...What sort of girly response did YOU write down?"
"I-I-It's nothing!!
Let's move on to this next topic, moving o-- ...Ah."
Before I knew it, Rika-chan had circled behind me and was intently reading the memo I had hidden behind my back.
"...'Card Master Sakura' is written down here."
It became dead quiet.
The abrupt silence enveloped the room.
It would be fine if somebody at least laughed at me or played it off as something dumb... but nobody even flinched.
The feeling in the pit of my stomach reached critical mass, causing my once blood-drained face to flush with a sudden wave of heat.
"Sa--
Sa-Sa--
Sa-
kura can only mean 'Card Master Sakura,' can't it!?!?
It's a super-popular anime that's broadcast every week on the government-run networks!!!
It's broken through to every demographic from little girls to grown meeeeeeen!!
You've seen it, haven't you!?
No, you've definitely seen it, even I've seheheeen iiiiiiiiit!!!!"
"...Um yeah, even without the forced explanation, I know about it.
It's that thingy where she fights in a different costume every week, right?
Yeah.
I know, I know."
"Yup, yup.
It's kyute, isn't it!
Rena sometimes browses through it at the magazine stand to keep up with the story☆."
"I saw it for the first time recently.
Sakura is cool and so cheerful all the time!"
"...I like that girl who's always filming with the camcorder."
"It's not just popular with little girls, it's also surprisingly well-received by older boys, isn't it?
...To think that Kei-chan was one of those~."
I felt like I had inadvertently blurted out something unnecessary and had completely self-destructed but... that wasn't the main problem.
"S-So you all know it, don't yoooooooou!?!?
Then why didn't you write it dooooooooooooown!?!?
Sakura means Sakura Kinomoto!!
Sakura-tan *pant pant*!!
Card Master Sakura is the right answeeeeeeeeeeeer!!!"
*poomph*
Mion quietly put her hand on my shoulder.
"Kei-chan.
...Now I am certain.
...Kei-chan, you are to your very core...
A geezer.
Irrevocably so."
"GyaaaaaaaaAAAaaaaaAAA!!
Why is everybody looking at me with those eyes filled with piittttttyyyyyyyyy!!!"
"Th-That's not true, Keiichi-kun...
Ok!
Let's do our best!
Here's where the comeback begins!"
"There's no coming back for Keiichi-san the geezer!!
Now give up quietly and accept your penalty!!"
Wh-What was today's penalty game again... !?
"Dressing up as a maid, complete with hairband and garter belt, while carrying around the winner's stuff."
"Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!!!"
"Alright!!
If you're real members of this club, show me you won't let anybody come back from this disadvantage!!
Alright, alright, let's keep it rolling!!"
...Heh heh heh.
"Aaaahahahaha...!!!"
"Whoa, Keiichi-kun seems happy? ...Why!? How can this be!?"
"Ahahaha!
He's probably awoken to the joys of cross-dressing~."
"Ah, Keiichi-kun, your hairband is going to fall off.
Let me fix that for you."
Rena cheerfully adjusted the hairband that had been enshrined upon my head.
"How does it feel, Kei-chan?
Have you awoken to the pleasures of wearing girl's clothing in front of actual girls~?
Be honest now.
It's alright!
We won't laugh~!!"
"Argggghh!!!!
You jerk!!!
I'm gonna murder you!!"
Swinging Mion's bag about wildly, I chased her in circles for a bit.
Today's loser was quickly decided to be me.
When I had been assured of finishing last, Mion showed her true power!!
She began racking up points with an iron fist. In the end, we didn't even have to add up the score to know who was on top.
After that, in the changing room...
With much wailing and gnashing of teeth,
pushing the boundaries of shame and brutality, I was instructed by Mion on how to put on everything from ribbons to underwear...
...D-Damn you Mion... What do you mean, knowing this will come in handy one day...
"How the bloody hell will a man knowing how to put on a garter belt be usefuuuuuUUul!!!"
"Shhhhh!!
Kei-chan, you're too loud!
If you stay quiet you might be able to pass this off as rehearsal for a play~."
"Sh-She's right...
If you cause a scene here...
Th-They'll...
find out that you're wearing women's clothing right down to the unmentionables."
UnggooooOOOOOooooaaaaaaaAAAaaaa!!
I shuddered from head to toe, resisting the urge to scream.
"Actually, Kei-chan, you have really smooth skin.
Are you often told that it's easy to apply makeup on you?"
Saying that, Mion gently rubbed my cheek.
UwhoAA! What kind of man gets praised for being easy to apply makeup on them?
"How does it feel wearing a maid's hairband?
It really finishes off the look!
The hairband is the best part of a maid outfit, after all~!"
"Wh-Wh-What do you mean, finishes off the look!?
Dumbass!
Stop teasing me!!"
"Hehehehe!
Keiichi-kun is embarrassed. Kyuuuuute~...☆"
"That's right.
Men like things like garter belts, right~?
So, how does it feel wearing one yourself☆?"
"I d-d-don't really feel a-anyth--!
Hey! Stop it!
Don't flip it up!!"
"It's tight, isn't it?
Can you feel it rub against your skin as you walk?"
S-Stop~...!
Don't whisper such strange things in my ear~!!
H-Hau...!
My miserable manhood subtly shifted.... eek~...!
"You're turning red, you're turning red.
...Have you finally realized it?
That's right.
Right now, Kei-chan is... exactly the type of maid that every healthy male wants."
Stop it, Mion~!
Really, why do you have to whisper that right in my ear!!!
"Have you ever just wanted to hold a maid close to you...?
Kei-chan, you've currently become one with that maid.
Don't you see?
That's a distance far closer than mere touch can ever achieve.
...There, can't you hear that pulse... that breath...?"
"Mi-Mi-Mi-Mi-Mi-Mii-chan... That's... Hau...!"
On the verge of overheating, a long red line flowed out of Rena's nose.
"Putting on makeup properly, making you wear a wig with the straight, long hair you like so much...
...Kei-chan, I've made you into your ideal woman...
And now, you're going to walk around town with me.
You'll surely monopolize the eyes of all the men.
...That would definitely make you feel really good, wouldn't it...?
If o~nly you didn't have this big thing dangling between your legs you'd be a real girl~~!!"
Saying that, she tried to flip my skirt!!
WaAa!!
This is definitely NOT the time!!
I can't let them see me with this male-centric probleeeeeeem!!
*CRASH* *THUD*
Before I realized it, Rena was caressing my head and rubbing me with her cheek.
"Keiichi-kun, when you were fidgeting like that, you were su-su-su-su-supeeer kyute!!
I-Iiiii'm going to take you hooome~~~!!!"
Peering through Rena's vice-like embrace, I saw Mion laying spreadeagle on her back.
...I see.
This must be what Satoko and Rika-chan feel like when they become Rena's prey...
After that, it took quite some time to calm Rena down from her frenzy...
"Later, Kei-chan.
Today was super enjoyable... hee hee hee!!"
"You will rue this day, Miooonnn~!!!
This disgrace shall be returned tenfold!!
I'll achieve an overwhelming victory, then condemn you to a public shaming!"
"Gyaaaahahahaha!!
Only if you can beat me!
I look forward to seeing you try!"
Mion tossed me my clothes, and looking in as good a mood as I've ever seen her, left.
...Okay now.
"...Now that I've been released by Mion, I can't waste even a second running home."
"By the way.
Rena isn't as good as Mii-chan.
...So if we happen to bump into anybody, I won't be able to follow up for you, okay☆?"
Soon after that, I went into a full-out dash!!
I'm pretty sure I was running the 100m in about 6 seconds there.
"Well then, Keiichi-kun.
See you tomorrow~!"
"Yeah! See you tomorrow!!!"
The fact that I didn't bump into anybody I knew was probably divine favor for my constant good behavior!
It's been going my way today...
At that moment the front door opened, as if somebody was waiting for me.
"Oh, Keiichi.
So you're home.
...I was just about to go for a walk."
...I was dumbstruck by how slow my father was to react.
...A normal person would have realized the peculiar scene before them around: "Oh, Keiichi."
"Ah, umm... Dad.
...This is ...you see, you know that club I'm always talking about? This is one of the penalty games we do there...
It just so happened I lost today..."
...My dad placed his hand on my shoulder.
It was an oddly moist, and uncomfortably warm hand...
"...Keiichi.
Let's have a little talk in my studio.
We'll keep it a secret from Mom, of course!!!"
"N-No Dad, let go!!
T-There's a show I want to watch right now!!!"
Mion, you shall rue this day!!!!
His artistic flame raging like wildfire, my dad dragged me along. I disappeared into the depths of the studio...
"Keiichi, are you home?
Oh, you were in the bath.
...Is that... makeup remover?"
"Uh... I-- wahahahahahahaha!!!
M-More importantly, what's the matter?"
"Sorry.
I have a headache and don't think I can make dinner tonight.
I'm terribly sorry, but can you go out to eat with your Dad?"
My mom is a go-get-em superwoman at work, but it occasionally takes a toll on her health.
So this kind of situation is hardly a rarity.
"That's fine but...
What will you eat?"
"If it's just for myself, I can probably find a way to scrounge something together.
Take care."
"Keiichi~!!
We'll take the car so hurry up!"
Dad quickly got the car ready.
He must be hungry, he really only moves so energetically when it's time to eat.
"Sorry to keep you waiting.
So, where are we going to eat?"
"...Hmmm.
I recently found a nice store. Let's go there!"
My dad usually only complains about things. For him to actually praise something is... unexpected.
I wonder what kind of place it is that he'd rank it 3 stars.
As one who seeks the way of the gourmand, I, Keiichi Maebara, am genuinely intrigued!
The headlights of the car cut through the early darkness of the Hinamizawan night, carving a straight path towards town.
I was pondering where such a gem of a restaurant could be hidden away... it was, shockingly, the family restaurant right by the station.
"Dad... that great restaurant you were talking about... was this?"
The words "Angel Mort" were written on a very family restaurant-esque cartoonish logo.
It had the air of a girl-oriented all-you-can-eat cake buffet rather than a proper restaurant.
"You've never been inside, Keiichi?"
Come to think of it... I hadn't.
There's been some times where I've travelled to faraway towns to eat.
But, returning only as far as Okinomiya Station, there was really no reason to dine out.
Home was just a stone's throw away after all.
...I see.
That was the reason I never noticed it before.
We stopped the car in the restaurant's parking lot.
...It seems like business is booming.
There's quite a few cars parked here.
But what really amazes me are the license plates.
...There's a lot of them that can't be from this area.
...Fukuyama, Nagoya-- well that's fine...
...
Chiba!?
...Saitama!?
Opening up my mental geography book, I calculated how long it would have taken to get here via the major highways...
"Heh heh heh.
Keiichi, it seems that you've finally realized how amazing this restaurant is..."
"W-What's the meaning of this!?
How can so many people travel from so far away just to come to this restaurant!?"
Following my dad, I climbed the steps and entered the building.
The bell attached to the door clattered as we entered, and a waitress soon greeted us. After confirming our party size and whether we wanted a smoking or non-smoking seat, she guided us inside.
Dad ordered two of the daily specials.
It seemed that they were ready-made, so there wasn't much of a wait at all until our meals were brought to us.
The taste was - no offense to Dad - not so different from your run-of-the-mill family restaurant...
"...If you're just talking about the taste... it seems like normal family restaurant fare."
"Who gives a damn about the taste, Keiichi!
See~...
Isn't it great~☆"
...I see.
It just may be... that the food here might be nothing more than average.
The demographic of the customers was pretty much all young men.
...It may call itself a "Family Restaurant," but there wasn't a single table with a family.
And yet it was packed.
The parking lot was filled with cars from all corners of the country.
...If they didn't come from far and wide to eat this completely mediocre food... then there's only one other reason.
Dad flagged down a nearby waitress.
"Excuse me~, the dessert that comes with the meal still hasn't come yet~."
"Oh... I—!
I-I'm so sorry..."
"There's a dessert that comes with Daily Combo A.
I've been waiting for quite a while."
"Oh it's— ...M-My apologies. I'll bring it right away!"
The apparently rookie waitress rushed off flustered.
"...Dad.
...Could it be this restaurant is..."
"Aren't they great~?
The waitress's uniforms here, I mean~~♪."
BAM!!
"W-W-What are you doing, Keiichi!?
My own father never hit me!"
"I'm your son!!"
"Listen, Keiichi, I've never come here with impure intentions.
That belle and attirante and excentrique clothing, quel effet!
It is my artistic muse!
I wanted you to feel that!!
Even you must have yearned for this stimulation!!
Haven't you!?
Coming here alone, though, is a bit embarrassing.
You understand!!
That's why I dragged you here!
Just blame me!
Even if you must condemn me... I wanted you to know this feeling KeiichiiiIIIIiiiii!!!
.... Aah...
I need to take a leak..."
My father has always had a bad habit of trying to hide his embarrassment using incomprehensible nonsense as a smokescreen.
...I want to believe that this weirdness won't be genetic.
Continuing his one-sided rambling, my father stood up and headed to the washroom.
With him gone, I was left alone in the booth.
...Finally, at this time, a feeling of embarrassment welled up inside me.
...I had nothing to do but go beet-red with shame.
The waitress from before returned, her eyes alternating between the order slip and the table.
"Uh... ummm..."
Arriving at my seat, she hesitantly tried to say something.
A more veteran waitress offered some advice from over her shoulder.
...Just calm down, and say "Sorry for the wait...!"
"Ummm... Terribly sorry for the wait..."
Right, right, just like that!
Do your best!
Whispering that into her ear, the veteran waitress left.
This waitress must have just been hired.
With an absolute lack of confidence, she moved hesitantly and maybe even somewhat perilously. Just watching her put me on edge.
I silently watched as she placed the dessert on the table with an inexperienced hand.
...But... it's just as Dad said... what incredible uniforms these are...
They were like... a bunny girl plus a maid plus some sort of frilly outfit, all in a perfect ratio... most certainly a rather dubiously charming kind of fashion.
...In any case, she in no way appeared to be a proper waitress.
What should I do... I was catching glimpses of too many things... that is... I didn't know where I should look.
Wearing something like that walking around the restaurant... it's as bad as it can be for digestion...☆
Even though she was wearing the outfit, this particular waitress had no idea what to do either.
This flustered state, without a doubt, should be attributed to the amount of bare skin showing rather than being new to the job.
Both the waitress and I mutually avoided eye contact... what a platonically embarrassing feeling this is.
...I'm a customer you know!?
It's alright to be more straight-forward!
....Hau~... my nose is starting to bleed~ ...
At that moment, our eyes just happened to meet.
Both of us blinked, doubting who we were looking at.
...What?
This is...
".........
Mion, is that you?"
".........Eh..."
On top of her hair being let down, she was so far removed from her usual confidence-filled attitude...
I didn't realize it was her at all.
It was Mion!!!
Why is she here!?
"You...
Why are you working at a place like this...!?"
"Uh,
Ah,
Ummm,
...I-I'm helping out at my uncle's store..."
Come to think of it... I did hear her talk about how her relatives have stores in town, and that she sometimes works part-time to help them!
"......
Oooh~~~!
That must be a lot of work."
The nervous feeling I had dissipated in an instant.
Knowing that this was Mion, there was no reason to feel that way.
Well, actually... my animal instinct tells me that the power balance between Mion and myself has been turned upside-down!
That's right, I'm a customer!
My position is superior to hers!
The humiliation from today's penalty game was cutting through the recesses of my mind...
There really is a God!
For Him to grant me this opportunity for revenge!!!
Noticing the flames of vengeance burning in my eyes, Mion took a step back.
"But... seeing it like this, this type of clothing suits you very nicely, doesn't it~☆."
"I-It's embarrassing, so...
...Don't look so much..."
I confirmed my pre-emptive strike was a clean hit!
There's no mistaking that Mion is currently defenseless!!
While confirming my attack was successful I simultaneously lined up the combo!!
"Mion, you have pretty big breasts, it seems like they're ready to spill out even right now...
All the customers are definitely looking at you~!"
"D-Don't... say... that..."
"Don't play coy with me~!
I know that you enjoy drawing all the male attention with that embarrassing get-up~!
I mean, if you didn't, there's no way you'd dress up like that~!"
"I-It's not like... I'm doing this... because I like to..."
I-Is this alright, Keiichi Maebara?
A-Aren't you taking this a little too far!?
Even if it's payback for that humiliation during the day... isn't this too much?
Hey, shut up, Logic!!
To pay back Mion tenfold is a chance you'll hardly ever get!!!
"Wearing this kind of get-up, your mother must be disappointed~!"
"*whimper*"
"That part where you can almost just see something is the best!
Come closer~!!"
"Eek~ ...Please stop~...!"
"You still lack the spirit of service towards your customers!!"
"P-Please forgive me~...!"
"Hau~~~I wanna take you home~~~♪"
"No, not thaaaAAaaaat~...!"
Entering a version of Rena's Kyute Mode, blood spewing from my nose like a waterfall, I was going until I had no regrets!
I was going to complete this verbal humiliation pla... --I mean-- revenge for today's events.
"Yup! I'll spare you the rest for today. ......Hau~~☆."
It seems that Mion's neural circuits had completely shorted from the embarrassment.
I might have teased her a little too much, or so I thought. But such a meek Mion is something you hardly ever see, so this was good for now.
...Leaving aside what exactly was 'good.'
"I never knew.
To think that the High-and-Mighty Mion would have a hard time being a waitress!"
"......*whimper*...Um,
...Th-That's wro--"
"This is such a surprising side of you~!
I want to show this to the Mion from this afternoon!
...Actually, I want to show Rena and the others.
Rena will definitely flip out with joy!
Do you think she'll say she wants to work here?"
"Th-That's.... wrong..."
"I could never imagine in my wildest dreams that such a kyute outfit would suit you Mion!"
"I-I'm saying that's wrong!!"
While turning bright red, Mion finally spit out the words that were lodged in her throat.
"What do you mean,
...That's wrong?"
"I-I'm!
.........
Not Mion!!!"
...Wha?
I was taken aback at Mion's confusing words.
"If you're not Mion... then who are you?
You're Mion Sonozaki right?"
"Umm...... I'm sorry.
I should have said this earlier but...
My name is Shion Sonozaki.
...Mion is my older sister."
My eyes unconsciously widened with surprise from this brazenly crazy talk.
Mion, probably thinking that there was no way such a far-fetched excuse would work, turned bright red while fidgeting nervously.
"Shion...?
Shion Sonozaki?"
"Y-Yes...
I'm often mistaken for my sister..."
"But, when we met, you had the kind of response that you wouldn't make if we were meeting for the first time."
"Th-That's because... my sister is always talking about you... so I knew who you were..."
A little bit of a cringeworthy excuse, that is.
...But... when I looked at Mion's eyes, which begged me to believe her, the urge to tease completely subsided.
To us, Mion had to be a leader who was normally overflowing with confidence, a guiding force.
If I were to lash out at that Mion, I would have ruined something I shouldn't have.
That was something I would never wish for.
So I understand.
This foolishness here, is something very different from the everyday Mion.
That's why... she's "Shion."
".........I see.
In that case...
I'm sorry."
"O-Oh no, as long as you understand.
My sister has a lot of enemies, you see."
Well now, she's self-aware of that fact now is she.
As I unintentionally laughed aloud, Mion --no, Shion-- laughed with me.
"Shion, is this your first time being a waitress?
It doesn't seem like you're used to it."
"Actually, today is... umm... Kei-chan is my first customer."
A little flustered after saying that, she quickly asked if it was okay for her to refer to me the same way her sister did.
...Seeing that blatant quirk was so cute, I couldn't stop laughing.
"So, you said you've worked part-time at your uncle's store before?
I thought you would have been more used to it."
"Oh, I have other relatives that run shops.
That's why... this is the first time I'm helping the uncle that owns this place..."
I see, makes sense.
Anybody would be tentative doing a job they weren't used to.
"Does Mion ever help out at this store?"
"Oh, my sister is, you see...
She's not good with these cutesy things..."
...I know what she's trying to say.
"That's right.
Mion is more suited for cool things!
So I think having you help out here was the right choice."
"...Huh?"
Shion asked, probably thinking she misheard me.
"That uniform; it would never suit somebody like Mion.
...But for Shion, I think it works."
"Huh,
......You mean that
...Ummm..."
Shion, like Rena often does, spaced out and turned bright red.
"Wh-...What does that mean... exactly..."
...At least for this moment, it felt like this Shion character actually existed.
...Because there was no way that the Mion I knew had this side to her.
At that moment, we realized that the more veteran waitress was waving at us from across the room.
"Sonozaki-sa~n, you can take your break now~!"
"Oh, o-okay...!"
Mion finally returned to her senses. It seemed as if it was time for her to take her break.
"Well, then... I'll take my leave. It was fun talking to the infamous Kei-chan."
"Sorry for mistaking you for Mion and teasing you.
Please tell Mion that I will have my revenge one day."
"Ah... that thing where you were forced to dress as a maid and walk around outside, right~?"
That devilish laugh and smile, it was exactly the same as the one I knew.
"That's right.
Tell her that I will return the favor for the total humiliation I suffered!"
"Bleh~.
More importantly, I'm going to complain to my sister about the teasing I had to endure today.
My sister will have my revenge during your club activities! Ahahahaha...!"
"Ahahahaha! Bring it on!! I'll get her before she gets me!!"
Mion laughed with a warm smile devoid of any remaining nervousness, and disappeared into the back...
...I felt like I had a very valuable experience today.
That's right, for now I know the High-and-Mighty Mion has a weak point to panic and get embarrassed about...
But, of all things... for her to say she has a twin sister...
I thought that maybe I should ask Rena tomorrow if she really has a sister.
...But maybe it's better that I didn't ask.
...It's a bit mean-spirited.
I've decided that the person I met here today was "Shion," the younger twin sister.
So, I'll refrain from doing anything that would deny that.
It's not that we actually made a promise or anything...
...But that little exchange gave birth to a new rule between me and Mion.
Somebody tapped me on the shoulder.
It was my dad.
...That was a long trip to the washroom.
He probably came up with a new idea for an art piece when he was sitting on the can.
"Keiichi, are you about ready?
Let's go home."
Settling the bill, my father had his customer card stamped.
......It was pretty much filled.
Damn, Dad, you're quite the regular customer...
"Was that new waitress just now somebody you know, Keiichi?"
"Oh, so you were watching from the shadows..."
Dad has the oddest sense of tact sometimes...
"Somebody from school?
From Hinamizawa?"
"Yeah. She's the little sister of my friend Mion.
Her school isn't in Hinamizawa, so she must go to one in town.
...I've never seen her at my school."
"Hmmm. So not all the kids in Hinamizawa go to the same school?"
"Only about half.
The other half go all the way into town on their bikes."
In this way, the feeling that I was really talking to Shion came to me.
What should I say to Mion tomorrow?
I met your little sister! ...Something like that?
Even with Mion being like that, us having a secret between the two of us made me both a little happy and a little embarrassed.